Confusing selfishness with the state of mind.

I may have overlooked one thing throughout my blog that may very well make an Aspie come across as selfish.... well to be honest, I am not sure if it is a character trait inherited from my father or if it really as an Aspie problem.  This is the trait that I show when I have my mind set on something, It really hurts me to have to change my mind.  It's a little hard to explain the reason for it, but I'll give it my best.
My brother had his stag party last night.  It was alcohol free but there were some laughs shared.  I am not sure if we would have gotten away with getting him to do the things he did back home.  It is a little different down here in Lima.  I do remember the last thing he wanted to do before the night was over was to go see a movie that I didn't want to see.  I don't think my father wanted to go to a movie either.  I mentioned something to my cousin and he pointed out that "It's your brother's stag.  I know it must be killing your father and you are probably right.  Once you have your mind set to do something, you don't like it when people force a change of heart for you.  It's something you will have to work on."  I was actually upset about having to go to a movie I didn't really want to see when I'd rather go home and just rest up for the evening.  I ended up finding out later on that I may have been right with wanting to go home as I felt a little sick after the movie.  I have been going way too long without water throughout and I didn't drink any water during the movie either
Dating experiences... this is the most painful part of me.  Once I have it in my mind that it's over, it's over.  There isn't any going back and there is no change of heart or mind after.  I can't do much and I have found that when others want an explanation or want something from me, I push away instead since my mind was already made up.  I find this usually happens when someone hurts me.  Go figure.  No wonder why I can't keep people around for more than a month or two.  Someone said to me once that my biggest reason for failure in dating and relationships is because of my low-to-zero tolerance for bullshit.  "You will never succeed in the dating world or in relationships if you can't let a person in after they hurt you," was the comment I got.
Work- There isn't much you can do in the work environment.  Saying no when you have to do something you don't want to do could easily result in you getting fired at some point.  Of course, the thought of not making money more often than not forces me to suck it up more often than not.  However, I managed to find a way to communicate what I don't like and what I do like to my supervisors to help accomodate me better.  It usuallly works out fine. 
Wish I was more effective with this in social experiences and dating.  But the problem is in the social life is you will get excluded just for saying no in a careless manner.