As for meltdowns: Forget Aspergers. Everyone on the Spectrum seems
to think that they only have a meltdown of some kind. Here is the
truth: Everyone regardless of a disorder is capable of a meltdown. The
way a person thinks is the primary reason for such meltdowns to happen.
Sensory issues for Autism: yes, for me if I can't
escape an area in which loud irritating noise is present, I will
meltdown. That is about the only excuse I will have for a meltdown
caused by a sensory issue. Recently, I found myself trying to cope with
it rather than run away. But I have never been able to effectively
deal with it.
It's all in your mind:
Fear:
the biggest reason for any meltdown to occur. But exactly what is
causing the fear for you? It could be a number of reasons. Only the
person who is experiencing the meltdown will know for sure since they
know themselves well enough or ought to know. The trend I am seeing is
it revolves around those who can't escape the identity that they created
for themselves and can't break free of this mold. I am starting to see
that these meltdowns occur because people can't let go of the past or the emotions they have in an effective manner. I
am starting to see these meltdowns may occur because people give in to
self-defeating thoughts and behaviours. I have also noticed that
dependency on the acceptance of others is also a problem. All of these
trends lead right back into fear.
Your identity (ego)-
For me, it was identifying too much with the Aspergers Diagnosis. The
truth is simple: it's just a diagnosis, or label if you must. I have
probably said this before, but if you want to live by a label, you will
have to be prepared to die by that label. Truthfully, noone wants to
live by their diagnosis of anything. People just want to be themselves
and not what others want them to be. The harsh reality about holding on
to your identity is that you are probably depending on others to like
you for it. Your identity is just a mask of who you really and only
appeals to those who don't want to see the real you.
Letting go of the past- I
have to make this very clear right now: What happens in the past stays
there. Sure it helped you learn a few things along the way as it should
have. But relying on the past to solve all of your problems in the
present and moving forward doesn't always work. The reason it doesn't work is each person and each situation you are in is different in it's unique way. You need to find
alternatives to your solutions or you will never escape the identity you
created for yourself. The best example I have is the fact that I chose
to delete a friend of Facebook years ago because she lied to me about
not wanting a relationship at that point in time. I did this same thing
to a girl back in the fall after we stopped dating eachother. The
truth is that I used a past scenario to solve a problem in what was a
present setting. I was too afraid of using a different method of
solving a problem and was using an old method based off the ego I
identified with and the fact that I never truly let go of the past.
A failure to let go of the past will result in not dealing with your issues or not letting go at all.
This is a very critical mistake that can likely lead to self-doubt and
self-defeating behaviours. People in the past weren't accepting of you
and you have to let that go. People in the present aren't going to be
accepting of you either and you can't be looking for acceptance in order
to be happy.
Expressing yourself effectively- A person who can't express himself effectively is somewhat who likely allows others to make them feel guilty. This is a burden in itself if you look at from a negative perspective. What it really is to me is this: A person who can't express themselves likely puts the needs of another person ahead of their own.
A good scenario for this: When it comes time to ask the other person to do something for you, they may say no. You ask again a little while later and you get no for an answer. Keep going and now you might be frustrated at all the giving you are doing and all the taking they are doing. The saying goes "Give an inch, they take a mile." This is what happens when you get used by someone and they always say no when you ask them a favour. How you go about expressing yourself may impact whatever friendship the two of you have moving forward. You are right to express yourself, however, don't be surprised if the other person fails or even refuses to understand where you are coming from. There is not much you can do at that point. The majority of time (99.9%), you have no reason to feel guilty and maybe a small reason to feel sad about what happened.
Ideally, these are some key things that can cause meltdowns. Fear, self-defeating behaviours and thoughts, fear of leaving the past behind you, and fear of moving forward.
