Ego and Confidence

This is a novel idea that many people may have learned, but how many people actually know this (hint, I alluded to this in the Tale of the Honest man).  Your ego and Confidence are two different things.  But what makes them so different.  I keep hearing the debates on the Wrongplanet.net dating forum that these guys believe that identity and status are important to the partners they attract.  The truth is these guys aren't entirely wrong.  But they focused way too much on the ego portion of things and less on the confidence.  It's easily noticeable that they haven't focused on the confidence because they were too focused on the identity of others.  I am just as guilty and who knows how long it will take before the confidence is where it needs to be in order for me to establish and maintain the healthiest relationships with people.

The truth about your ego is this- it's all about your identity and status.  This is where your insecurity comes into play.  The less status you have, the more insecure you are and the more likely you are excluded from hanging out with people.  Your ego is what drives your reputation.  With your ego comes the selfishness of your behaviour as well.  Those with certain status want to be around those with people of the same status or higher.  People want to be validated and feel valued based off their ego.  It is not to be confused with confidence however.

Confidence truly comes from your emotions and your ability to control it.  It comes from knowing how to express yourself appropriately (time and place, as well as the intensity of the emotion).  The less a person knows about expressing themselves appropriately, the worst their confidence is.  However, it is well known that a person who never expresses their feelings or doesn't handle rejection well is lacking in confidence.  It is the lack of confidence or none at all is where a person is all about ego.  This usually doesn't help in maintaining and establishing relationships.

So of course... a stronger ego is influenced by confidence. The less confident you are, the more fragile your ego. The more confident you are, the more status you attain.